Discovering Stoneywell

If you should pass through Charnwood on a sunny afternoon

You might just spot a sign to Stoneywell

And there beside the hornbeams and the heathers you will find

A haven with some tales still to tell.

James Bilson found a site to build in 1897

Two cottages for workman was his plan

Ernest Gimson, architect, was asked to do the job           

But he wanted someone else to share the land.

Gimson most admired the views he found at Ulverscroft.

At Chitterman, he toiled for just a year.

Then his brothers who were keen to leave the Leicester smog behind

Were persuaded they might come and settle here.

So Ernest set about the task of building yet again 

Two cottages for Mentor and for Syd.

Lea cottage, white and dressed in thatch, adjacent to the road

And Stoneywell secluded and well hid.

With the stable block behind you a footpath stretches forth.

Past fortresses where youthful limbs once played. 

Through the bilberries and ericas the sheep-walk leads you down

To a summer home where memories were made

The site that Ernest favoured lay beyond a twisted rowan

Thus a house was born, emerging from the granite

Along a zigzag path she stretched, tumbling down a slope.

Only genius would have the gaul to plan it.

Not only was he 'architect' he furnished them as well

From his workshop in the Cotswolds as his base

So he needed someone special to supervise the build

That's when Detmar Blow was brought in on the case

Now Detmar had a habit if he spied a rock he'd grab it.     

He'd take them from another fellah's land

He'd knock down some stone-wall, then he'd make it up again

So you might say, 'stones he used were second-hand.'

Strolling through this home so many wonders are revealed

It's a 'curious and enigmatic place.'

Where artistry and craftsmanship are skillfully combined

Giving glimpses of the past in time and space.

Though this cottage is spectacular its style remains vernacular

Simplicity and workmanship are key

An architectural gem that's distinctly arts and craft

But I've said enough, so now you come and see.

A Walking tour through the Woodhouses

Proceeding from the hilltop overlooking Woodhouse Eaves,

Here, the remnants of a windmill can be seen.

If the viewing platform's open you could see to Loughbro' town 

If it wasn't for them Outwoods in between.

Descend the leafy bower from the windmill and you'll find

A wayside chapel, lower down the lane

Through a trio of arched windows, do I spy a wisp of smoke?

Mrs Mollart's burnt the welsh-cakes yet again!

 

Across the road to Maplewell, you'll spot a timbered hall 

Where the lib'rals often met, in days of yore.

Here they spouted rousing speeches from the balcony above,

Even though the peasants found it quite a bore.

From this hall of liberty, raise your eyes towards the arch

That still stands below the summit of Nanhill.

As a tribute to those lads who went off to fight a war

Gone forever, though the memories linger still.

There lies a hidden gem, just beyond these hedges tall

A roundhouse, 'neath the thatch, to store the game.

What sort of game? I hear you ask, I haven't got a clue

But the balls must have been massive all the same.

A stroll along the donkey slip, which posh folk call 'Church Walk,'

Leads us on towards the rect'ry of St. Paul's.

For those who like their facts, 'twas the home of Basement Jaxx

Though no longer does their music rock these walls.

The "stone hole" lies behind the school, some folks call it a cave

Where the village children played come rain or shine. 

But I think it is a shame, that they removed the old school bell

I would want to nab it back, if it was mine.     

The Forest Rock has bit the dust, the Pear Tree is still serving

They have pastas, pizzas even panacotta.

But I mustn't say much more now or they'll say this is an 'ad'

Yet given half the chance, I'd eat the lotta.

The charming Slaters' Row is quite a picture to behold.

Hydrangeas grace each plot and cottage door. 

All those blooming flowers, don't they make a lovely show?

'Bet you've rarely seen such bloomers here before.

With barely one more hop, you're at Oakwood, Chemist shop 

Where the staff dispense advice with caring smiles

They'll never make a fuss as they sort you out a truss 

Or recommend a cream for all those piles.

On your right, the village hall, just in time to make a call

If we're lucky we might find they've got a rummage

Young farmers, guides or cubs have been scrounging round the pubs

Get there early or it can be quite a scrummage.

The surgery lies straight ahead, they strive to keep us healthy

The Methodists, next door, will deal with sin.

And if you cry, "But I am fit and pretty close to perfect." 

Then you're a 'better man than I am, Gunga Din.'

Stroll across the King's Field, picnic here or watch the cricket.

To Woodhouse next, with little time to rest.

Through meadows, passed old Rawlins' school and on to 'Pepper Lane'

To that cottage which, quite frankly, is a Pest.

For here lived Thomas Rawlins, who escaped a horrid death

When a pedlar called for rest and B and B.

Thank goodness he did not unpack his rucksack full of plague

But carried on to Eyam after Tea.

With Garat's Hay behind your back, approach the Welbeck site

No photographs! They'll slap you in the cooler.

The milit'ry security is pretty tight round here.

So we don't mess with the forces, as a rule-r.

The Old Bull's Head is looming up, we've no time for a snifter

For it's on towards the Beacon we are bound.

If you jog up to the summit then back down to Broombriggs' walk

You must follow all the signs to bring you round.

There's a new fence round an orchard where they've planted sapling trees,

Autumn fruits; like damsons, pears and cherries

So don't try any scrumping, for it just ain't worth the risk 

And the warden of the trees might squeeze your berries.

Returning past the windmill. Many thanks, the tour is ended.

I'm heading for the Curzon, it's down here.

Oh! My wallets in the pocket of the coat I left at home,

So I'm hoping one of you will buy the beer!

Disappearing Dogs along the Danube

Last year whilst enjoying a city break with my wife in Italy I explored the way florentine artists and sculptors had used our canine companions in their works. So this year when we had chance to travel to Hungary i thought it was an opportunity once again to seek out a few examples of dogs in art and stone from around the fine city of Budapest. How wrong I was. Although rich in pieces of public sculpture and art, examples of dog statues seemed few and far between. We did see plenty of pet dogs around the city several Bichon Frise and Shar Pei. There seems to be a custom of walking dogs without leads, testament perhaps to good training methods used by local owners.  

I have learnt to be subtle in my quest to seek out dog monuments as my wife has caught on to the fact that i will trek miles and end ways in my searching. She loves dogs but the barking and scampering variety; dog sculptures are not her thing. So this time, rather than leave it to chance, i decided to use the internet first to discover if and where I could find statues of dogs around the city. I was pointed in the direction of two sites. Firstly I noticed there existed a really sweet statue in bronze simply entitled, Girl with Dog, to be found close to the cafe France on the river embankment. As this was meters away from where we were due to embark on a short river-cruise I felt I could comfortably sneak off for a couple of minutes to snap a photo of the work. It took longer than a couple of minutes in fact after 25 minutes I had still seen neither hide nor hair of the little rascal. I returned to where I'd left my wife , by this time stamping her foot demanding a latte machiatti to placate her for being kept waiting. I explained what i was about and that said dog was not evident. She joined me, with my tablet containing photo of missing mutt, to assist in the search. Well, we found the lamp-post around which the bench should have been, on which the girl should have been sat, playing with her pet. It just wasn't there. I approached a young chap in a red tee shirt trying to entice passing tourists into the nearby cafe. Did he know the location of the statue of Girl with her dog? Yes, he did but it had been removed at Christmas when the city council decided to renew the paving slabs along this short stretch of the promenade through Vigoti Square. The statue had not been reinstated although another statue of a little princess, along the railings of the adjacent tramway, was by the same sculptor and was "very fine." Fine, it may have been but unless the little princess was a cocker spaniel I wasn't particularly interested. So that was failure number one. The next day we were on the city bus-tour passing through Elizabeth Square, the location identified , on the Web, for Budapest's famous Doberman statues. These should be really impressive! Two statues, each standing over twelve feet high, constructed on a metal frame out of wooden blocks by the modern hungarian sculptor, Gabor Miklos Szoke. We arrived at midday at this central location. We couldn't find the dobermans. I spotted three dachshunds and two greyhounds having 'walkies' but definitely no dobermans. I sort out a tour guide. The dobermans had indeed been there but as they were redeveloping the whole park area the statues had been removed, foiled again!

 However faithful reader before you gasp in despair I must reveal that my journey was not a total disaster for on the third day we were approaching the grand edifice which was once the royal palace on Buda hill. Approaching the building one sees a fine baroque fountain flanking one of the wings of Buda Castle. The Matthias Fountain (Mátyás kút), probably Budapest's most famous fountain was designed in 1904 by Alajos Stróbl. It depicts a scene from the legend of King Matthias and the beautiful peasant girl Ilonka. Rather brutish for modern taste it shows the king sat in triumph over a stag accompanied by his four hounds. One the right is the Italian chronicler, Galeotto Marzio who lived in King Matthias' court. A large deer-hound is resting at his feet and a falcon sits on his arm. We learnt that after much of the palace was destroyed in the second world war it was not until 2010 that the fountain was put back in its original state; I suppose we must consider ourselves lucky that these statues were restored at the same time!

Then on our final day would you believe I managed to locate a brand new statue, unveiled as recently as March 2014. It is of a Bassett hound and his equally famous owner, the legendary star of the TV crime series, Colombo. Yes, amazing as it is, there is a statue of the actor Peter Falk and his doggie companion only a stones throw from the St. Margaret island bridge. It is on the corner of a street aptly named Falk Miksa utca in Budapest’s District V and which was named after a 19th century Hungarian academic, newspaper editor and politician. According to the urban legends, he was the great grandfather of Peter Falk, whose jew ancestors – as it is written in Falk’s autobiography - came from Eastern Europe.

It sounds great but the problem is that there no any evidence for this. Nevertheless the statue made by Géza Fekete, a sculptor who conveniently lives just across the road, was commissioned because of Columbo's continuing popularity on Hungarian TV.  For the quiz enthusiasts among you, what was Columbo's dog called? No idea? Well, believe it or not it was Dog. Pathetic isn't it? all those little grey cells to solve crime and he couldn't even bother to give his dog a proper name.

The King's Pooch

For centuries man's best friend has also proved popular around the corridors of the world's grandest houses and palaces. From ancient times members of many royal households have lived alongside dogs of all shapes and sizes. 

Many were regarded as high-status symbols. For example, in Imperial China the Emperor was the only person allowed to own a PEKINESE and the death penalty awaited anyone foolish enough to try and steal one. An ancient breed they can be traced back to the Han Dynasty 206 BC - 220 AD. 'Lion dogs,' as they were known, were kept in great numbers at the courts but only the finest were allowed into the Emperor's private chambers. It was only after 1860 that this breed emerged in Europe

 Similarly in Tibet only the highest dignitaries in the land were permitted to own certain breeds. The LHASA APSO is believed to be one of the world's oldest breeds possibly dating as far back as 800BC. Developed from the Tibetan Terrier and the Tibetan Spaniel they were bred exclusively at monasteries and only rarely permitted to leave the country. A few were given away as special gifts, usually to other royalty, and were always male so that reproduction of the species remained under Tibetan control. As in China with the pekinese the LHASA APSO were revered as lions. They provided protection for Buddha and guarded monastic treasures, participating in religious ceremonies whilst enthroned on silk cushions. 

The SALUKI was considered "the royal dog of Egypt". In ancient Egypt, their bodies were sometimes mummified alongside their royal owners. The Saluki is a 'sight hound,'  is very fast with a reputation as a strong hunter capable of taking down prey like gazelles.

The BICHON FRISE was re-introduced to Europe from the Canary Islands in the 14th century and by the 16th century they became fashionable at the French and other royal courts like several of the toy breeds. 

Although the BRUSSELS GRIFFON were first described in medieval french writings they were a favourite of the Belgian royal family. The late Queen Astrid loved these little dogs which almost became extinct after the First World War but because of royal support regained popularity in the 1930s.

Already well-established in other European courts, before being brought into England in the late 1500s, CAVALIER "KING CHARLES" SPANIELS reached the height of popularity with Charles II.  However, Elizabeth 1 and Mary Queen of Scots had also kept them and just before her execution at Fotheringay Castle in 1587 one dog, hidden under Mary's skirts, was not discovered by the executioner until after her death. As well as companions they were known for their tenacity and sporting ability. The first Duke of Marlborough developed some of the larger sporting dogs and it is from these the BLENHEIM spaniel evolved.

The PUG became extremely popular in Victorian times yet again many european royals had been championing the breed for years. Their patrons included Henry II of France, Marie Antoinette and The Empress Josephine. Originally from the Orient they were brought to the West by merchants trading with China. It is thought that the breed was introduced into Great Britain by William III and Queen Mary when they ruled this country in 1689. George III's wife kept pugs of german origin. Queen Victoria, an avid dog lover, had a particular favourite named Bully, a fawn dog, which was a present from Prince Albert. In the mid-twentieth century they found favour again with the Duke and Duchess of Windsor.

Some royal pets have even merited their own portraits in various palace collections. When Queen Victoria’s COLLIE, Noble, died at Balmoral in 1887, he was buried in the grounds of the castle and given his own gravestone, which read:

'Noble by name by nature noble too

Faithful companion sympathetic true

His remains are interred here.'

Caesar, a WIRE FOX TERRIER was a devoted companion to Edward VII. He was allowed to sleep on a chair next to the King’s bed and even wore a collar that read “I am Caesar.  I belong to the King”.  After King Edward VII’s death in 1910, Caesar attended the funeral and walked in the procession ahead of nine Kings and several other heads of state.

The current Queen is, of course, associated with the CORGI. The breed was introduced to the Royal Family by her father, King George VI, in 1933 when he bought a Corgi called Dookie. The animal proved popular with both princesses and soon a second Corgi was acquired called Jane who had puppies, two of which, Crackers and Carol, were kept.

For her eighteenth birthday, The Queen was given a Corgi named Susan from whom numerous successive dogs were bred. Some Corgis were mated with dachshunds (most notably Pipkin, who belonged to Princess Margaret) to create ‘Dorgis’. At present, The Queen owns two Corgis: Willow and Holly and two Dorgis: Candy and Vulcan.

As far as other royals are concerned Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall own several JACK RUSSELL TERRIERS including the Prince's favourite, "Tigga" 

Princess Anne has owned a string of BULL TERRIERS although a couple of them have, over the years, attracted notoriety in the press for unwarranted attacks on other dogs. 

The latest royal pooch to hit the headlines belongs to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and is Lupo, a black COCKER SPANIEL. He was adopted by the couple just before Christmas 2011 from a litter allegedly born to the Middleton family dog, Ella.  The dog replaced a black LABRADOR named Widgeon, who was given to Prince William by his mother Diana, Princess of Wales, shortly before her death in 1997. 

Lupo also achieved some notoriety recently when a story in one newspaper revealed that Lupo had eaten a pair  of pearl earrings given to the Duchess by Prince William. However, this rumour was swiftly quashed by a royal spokesman so it seems Lupo's reputation is safe: for the moment at least.

Royal Flush

I’ll tell yer about Kings of England 

Along with a handful of Queens 

And, who followed who, in each century

All claiming blue blood in their genes.

The French sent the first Bill in 1066

After skirmish near old Hastings Town.

Next William Rufus, then Henry the first

Afore Stephen fought Maud, for the crown.

Now Henry Plantagenet, can you imagine it , 

Found himself next chap in line.

Next Richard the Lionheart, lacklander John

Then Henry the 3rd, who was nine.

Edward the First was the ‘hammer of scots.’

Edward Two just brought chaos and hassle

And noat more was heard from Edward the Third

After trip down to old Berkeley Castle.

Richard the Second took crown for a while

But was frankly a bit of a louse.

So got overthrown by Henry the Fourth, 

The first of the Lancaster house. 

Henry Five and then Six,  both entered the mix 

As the War of the Roses began.

From York in the north, came Edward the Fourth 

And he was a very tall man.

His sons were both princes in London’s white tower,

The elder became Edward Five.

But sadly he wasn’t around very long,

‘cos folks didn’t want him alive.

For hundreds of years they blamed Uncle Dick

Or Richard the Third as he’s known.

But Henry the Seventh ’s more likely the rogue

Who helped all them Tudors claim throne.

Now Henry the Eighth, that’s the bloke with six wives,

Though none were much help with the chores.

So he ranted and raved on for 38 years

Wouldn’t you with six mother-in-laws?

His nine year-old son became Edward the Sixth 

Soon followed by Mary, his daughter.

Then after her death came Queen ‘lizabeth 

Who ruled as her father had taught her.

Then Stuarts took over in 1603, 

With James , who was really a scot.

He nearly went bang in 1605 

All thanks to the gunpowder plot.

The next king was Charles, well he soon got the chop, 

After roundheads and Cromwell barged in.

Charles the Second felt merry and sometimes poor Nell

‘specially when tanked-up on gin.

The second King James lasted only three years 

Then together reigned William and Mary 

Queen Anne was the monarch with cabriole legs

Although I believe one was hairy!

Hanoverian George was offered the crown 

Though his English was said to be bad

A second George followed and later a third

Whose fifteen kids sent him quite mad.

With his Dad ‘off his trolley’ they brought in Prince George

And for nine years we had us a Regency

At his pad, down in Brighton, he’d party ‘till dawn

So hardly a picture of decency.

In spite of the beers, George the fourth had ten years

Then William the fourth became king.

But “Sailor Bill” died, without any brood

And that proved a most awk’ard thing.

His niece became queen, at the age of eighteen

So started the reign of Victoria. 

Prince Albert she wed, then the poor chap dropped dead 

Thus ending her chance of euphoria.

With the house of Hanover, decidedly over

A new royal household was found

So the throne went on offer, to SaxeCoberg-Gotha

When Edward the Seventh was crowned

Dislike of the Kaiser was rife in the war

So a new ‘Windsor’ house was created.

After Mary of Teck said, “I’ll marry, by heck.”

And the heir to the throne was elated.

So George took the throne when his father, Ted, died

And the fifth king to have such a name

But when Edward the Eighth was offered his chance

A crisis occurred, such a shame!

It just wasn’t his thing, for he wanted a fling 

With a woman who couldn’t be queen.

He soon abdicated, the throne was vacated 

So George the Sixth entered the scene.

Throughout the war King George held the throne

Until in the fifties he died

Since then we’ve had Lizzie who keeps very busy

With Philip, her Prince, by her side.

For sixty odd years she’s remained at the helm,

Whilst Charles calmly waits with his gal.

Yet Liz knows Camilla quite fancies her villa

Which stands at the end of the Mall.

Call the District Nurse

  Recently there have been a couple of television dramas exploring the lives of doctors and nurses working out in the community and these have reminded me of the numerous stories and anecdotes that my mother would tell of her experiences as a district nurse working along the edge of the Lincolnshire fens in the 1960s and 70s.

Nurse Jessie Temple (formerly Shaw) started her time on district work just when my brother and I had started at primary school. She was approached by a couple of local GPs to see if she would like to return to nursing, a career she had taken up during the Second World War. Before going off to study nursing she had worked on the family farm at East Keal for a time. She had tried out a few other jobs; acting as nanny to a couple of children at Langton Hall, cycling to work at a laundry at Skegness. She had not really enjoyed working on the land and talking to a couple of cousins, who had also chosen to train as a nurses, she found herself lodging with an aunt and uncle in Wisbech whilst she completed her training at the North Cambridgeshire Hospital. After marriage in the early fifties and a gap of 10 or so years she found it quite a challenge to pick up the reins of nursing again. However, she found working in the community was very different from working as one of a team in a hospital ward. Nevertheless, I think she was soon in her stride and remained on the district, in one capacity or another, until she retired in her late sixties.

 The job brought her up against many of the people with whom she had grown up; the farmers and folk who made their living from the land. She was less impressed by wealthy townies who had bought up country cottages only to ‘gut’ them and turn them into characterless weekend retreats. When she started out we didn’t own our own phone so every evening about a quarter to six she would stand in the telephone box which stood about fifty yards along the road waiting for the call telling her who required a visit the following day. It sounds odd but it was about two years before the health authority agreed to install a phone in our house. Oddly enough we were given a 2-party line so every time we needed the phone we had to press a button to take over the line. Curiously she was only supposed to use the phone for the first 30 minutes in every hour before our opposite number had precedence. As before the senior district nurse, Nurse Taylor, who lived within the grounds of Tattershall Castle, would ring daily to dole out patients to the three or four nurses under her charge. I recall in the mid sixties a Nurse Jackson covered the Woodhall Spa stretch and later on Nurse Mitchell, Nurse Eyre and my mother were brought in to share the increased work-load. My mother was not a midwife so she usually attended geriatric cases and long-term patients. The geographical area covered by my mother’s team was vast.  It stretched from Anton’s Gowt in the south (just outside Boston) to Horncastle and from Burgh le Marsh near Skegness to Billinghay just over the River Witham in the west. During the summer holidays I would travel with her on occasions reading my comic or listening to the radio whilst she visited some remote farm cottage out in the fen.

 On one occasion however I found myself in a right mess when, having fiddled with the car’s ignition, I caused the car to burst into life and it shot like a ferret after a rabbit right across a gravelled yard and through a low privet hedge. Although dramatic amazingly my escapade did little serious damage to both car and garden although my mother was none too pleased.

 As district nurse she visited some quaint places and met dozens of interesting characters over the years.

One lady she nursed, a member of the Lilley family, had been born and brought up in Teapot Hall, a unique, most curious example of vernacular cottage construction that stood just outside Dalderby off the Horncastle road. It was supposed to have been owned at one time by a retired captain of a tea clipper- hence its name. It was a timber-framed, thatched building shaped a bit like a section of Toblerone -  a prism in fact. Sadly it stood empty by the time of the Second world war and was burnt down in a fire in 1945 thought to have been started by some airmen celebrating the end of the war. The lady explained to my mother that at one time there were eight children living in the cottage with an outside privy (also thatched) and water only available from a pump outside the back door.

 Another patient was a former gamekeeper from Revesby Abbey who, at the time, still lived on the estate. He regaled mother with tales about shooting parties and grand dinners at the abbey when he was a young lad. Before the war his mother had worked in the kitchens of the great house and he would earn sixpence for assisting the chauffeurs polishing the cars of all the guests whilst visiting the Hall. He told her one story about a young lad from a local farm who was normally paid a few shillings to assist in ‘beating the bushes’ when visitors to the hall were invited to join a shooting party on nearby land. The lad was unlucky enough to get sprayed with shot on one occasion by one of the house-guests.  Fortunately he wasn’t badly hurt and as consolation for his injuries received a silver watch and chain from the guilty party.

Another of her patients was a descendent of George Jennings, one of the pioneers of the flush lavatory. I remember her telling me they still had a toilet and cistern decorated in blue peonies which they were still using every day in the 1970s.

After she retired she was still involved in caring when she joined the ranks of The Marie Curie and Macmillan nurses looking after terminally ill in the local community. She was also employed doing something that at the time I felt quite uneasy about; she would go out, often in the middle of the night, to assist the local undertakers, J.W. Sivill, in the laying out of the deceased. Only now can I look back and appreciate how hard she worked and how dedicated she was to serving her patients.

The Spaniel and the Mushroom Soup

 A lady was planning a supper party at her home for some close friends. She was a bit of a society snob and always liked to try and impress her dinner guests with the best locally sourced ingredients. She employed a cook who had a reputation for good, home-made rural fare. Unfortunately, on the day of the dinner, the cook was suddenly taken ill and couldn’t prepare the meal. The hostess knew that the maid was too inexperienced to be entrusted with preparing an impressive supper for her guests, so she decided she would have to prepare it herself.  She chose to serve a simple collation of the finest cold meats and cheese from the larder but thought she would also make a warming soup using a selection of mushrooms that she had found and picked in the adjacent woods whilst out walking with her pet spaniel . The maid queried this idea saying that Cook had often warned her that there were, “Many poisonous mushrooms in the woods that look just like the edible ones and perhaps Madam should reconsider serving wild mushroom soup.”

Madam, however, was having none of this and said she had made sure that the mushrooms she had picked were perfectly safe as she had given several pieces of the mushroom to the dog.

When the guests arrived she told them about the soup she had prepared and her way of testing the mushrooms. She went on to assure them that the dog was feeling fit and well. Supper went off very smoothly but a few moments after the dinner the maid suddenly ran screaming Into the dining room and shouted,

“Oh Madam, the dog is dead!”

The maid was instructed to ring for a couple of ambulances and after they arrived all the guests and the hostess were rushed to the A and E unit at the local hospital. After arriving at the hospital they all had their stomachs pumped using a nasogastric tube and a wash of activated charcoal, which was administered to prevent the absorption of any mushroom toxins. In addition, a strong bowel preparation of Colyte and magnesium citrate was given to all those who had partaken of the soup.

After a couple of hours the guests, feeling somewhat drained and weary, returned to the house of their hostess. The hostess ordered the maid to bring all her guests some strong coffee and brandy. When she returned with the drinks the maid said, ”Oh! by the way, the lorry driver is here to talk to madam.”

 Her hostess turned to the maid and asked, “What Lorry driver?”

The maid replied, “ The one who ran over the dog!”